So let me start off by saying that I am SICK AND TIRED of not being able to go to the gym, and work out with my trainer. Physical Therapy has been ridiculously helpful for my shoulder injury, but I feel like a waste of space without my routine. On Tuesday, at my PT appointment, I asked about heading back to work with my trainer, and the staff at the office collaboratively put together some ideas of things for me to do without further hurting myself.
On Wednesday, I was back at it. After PT on Tuesday, I immediately messaged my OLD trainer (I’mmmmmm BAAAAAACKKKK!!!) and told him what I could and couldn’t do. He was on board, and we scheduled my first day back with him, at a new facility.
I was freaking petrified of starting again, and honestly, I should have believed my fear. It was as if I had never been before in my whole life. So this new facility is a great space and like I described in a previous post, it was like an entire place made up like ‘The Green’, at my gym. Fortunately for everyone on planet earth, only two people were working out, while I was there. Unfortunately for me, they were both innocent children (Presumably, High Schoolers). I quickly got into Nanny Mode, and stifled my swears.
The very first thing the devil of a personal trainer I have wanted me to do, was jump up onto a block. Jump. I don’t jump. Let’s not forget, that I may be skinnier, but I’m not any more athletic. In fact, I still have all that BODY left hanging around (Picture E.T.), so jumping seems completely out of my reach. Never mind the fact that I have SLS (self diagnosed and named Short Leg Syndrome), and he wanted me to jump on a block half my height. After much complaining, his alternative for me was to ‘long’ jump down the track. I basically fucking hopped. I was completely self conscience, made fun of how far my distance was, and asked him to describe my jiggle upon landing. The whole time, one of the poor, innocent, children WATCHED and LISTENED (and smirked- little shit). I felt totally ridiculous, totally out of shape, and totally weak.
Those kids got the show of their life. I was this hot mess of a prematurely elderly bodied woman in her mid-thirties, struggling to breath, and move, who was threatening her trainers existence. Maybe they will use this live comedy show as motivation to never stop what they are doing, and to continue to work hard at the gym. That’s all I can ask for, really.
So, jumps, kettle bell lifts, step ups, sit and stand shit, sled pushing, and basically humping air from a laying position (I think I should make a video of this move to post on here) and I was done. It was only thirty minutes of pure hell, and sweaty eyeballs (yes.), but I was done. I landed on the floor of the gym, throat and chest burning, and all I could think was, ‘I feel like I’ve never done this before in my life’.
I’ll be back next week.
P.S. My text to my trainer after my session was not an apology for threatening his life. Instead, it was me telling him he missed me threatening his life. He responded saying that he agreed, and I was one of a kind. I think he loves me. ❤
P.P.S. My body hurt so badly that my arm was sore while stirring dinner.